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Episode 14

14. The Art of Being Yourself: Pushing Past Fear and Expectation - New Walking Episode!

In this episode, I explore the quiet but radical act of being yourself - of releasing imitation and returning to the truth of your own energy. We talk about the ways we unconsciously shape-shift for acceptance, confuse other people’s desires for our own, and limit our potential out of fear. You’ll walk away with a deeper understanding of how to discern what’s truly yours, how to feel your own energy again, and how to make decisions from the body, not the mind.

Gems in this episode:

  • The hidden ways imitation shows up in life, art, and self-expression
  • Why true alignment comes from energy, not achievement
  • How to recognise fear-based boundaries and expand beyond them
  • A soulful reminder to trust your body’s wisdom over the mind’s logic

Want more?


Follow Andrea:

Instagram: @houseofandrea

Website: www.andimatthies.com


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If this episode resonates, please share it and leave us a rating or review. This helps us reach new listeners who are seeking more support on these topics.


More about House of Andrea:

House of Andrea is created by host Andrea Lee Matthies in Naarm (Melbourne), Australia. Andrea is an artist, photographer and clairvoyant medium who explores the intersections of creativity, spirituality and the human experience. Her art and conversations invite us into spaces of spiritual expansion — where we see ourselves more clearly and live more fully as our highest selves.

New episodes every Tuesday 6am AEST. Make sure to hit subscribe/follow so you never miss an episode!

This podcast is part of the Cherry Fizz Network.


For collaboration & interview bookings: Drop us an email at hello@andimatthies.com

Transcript
Speaker:

This is the House of Andrea.

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I'm Andrea Lee Matthews, an artist,

photographer, and clairvoyant medium.

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And in this podcast, we explore what it

really means to thrive as a soul having

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a human experience, how to connect with

our energy, transcend those edges and

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boundaries that we create for ourselves.

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And open to the full

spectrum of who we are.

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If you're ready to see yourself

differently, to sense more deeply,

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and to expand into more of who you

are, you are in the right place.

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Let's dive in.

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Andrea Matthies: Good morning.

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Welcome back This is our

first walking episode today.

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This is a new format that I'm introducing

into the podcast, and so I'd love

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to know at the end of the episode.

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Feel free to send me a DM

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Whether you liked the sound of

the beautiful nature, 'because

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I'm recording these actually in a

beautiful nature reserve near my house.

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It runs along a river, so there's

beautiful sounds of birds all around

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me and the wind is rustling the

trees, which just sounds divine.

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So I'd love to know, do

you like this format?

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Is it blissful listening

to all of the beds or.

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Do you have any other thoughts?

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So let me know what you think, but

the idea of these episodes is to

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capture the daily contemplations and

the channelings that come through.

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So I tend to try and get

out for a walk every day.

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It doesn't always happen.

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What?

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I always try dry, and one of

the things that I've noticed is

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that when I am moving my body.

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It helps me really connect to

my spirit, and it also opens my

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channels up, particularly when I'm

in nature and I can just take my

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time and really deeply connect.

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So many beautiful

channeled messages come in.

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So I wanted to open this series up a,

to give me more options to be able to

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bring these beautiful episodes to you,

but also to start just recording some

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of these beautiful daily contemplations

that come in and a little bit of

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insight into what I often think about.

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Particularly in the context of this new

journey that we're moving into with the

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House of Andrea and on my own journey

as an artist, one of the things that

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has been coming through really strongly

of late is this sensation of this

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work is all about pushing our edges.

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Pushing the edges and the

boundaries of self and creativity.

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I think that really is the mission

of the artist, honestly, any artist,

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is to see the world and then push the

boundaries of how we can interpret that,

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how we can see that, how we can share

and express that back out with our,

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through our own lens, through our own

eyes, and often to be able to do that.

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We need to open our ability to

contemplate, to think deeply

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because there is such a tendency

to wanna mimic or produce things

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that are socially acceptable.

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And again, I'm not just

talking about art here.

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I have seen this pattern for myself over

so many different facets of my life.

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I've seen myself want to imitate or

regurgitate, but with a slightly different

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lens popping the label of innovation on

in so many different facets of my career.

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I remember when I was

in the corporate world.

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I would look around and look and analyze

the most successful people in that field.

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What are they doing?

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How are they showing up?

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How are they striving?

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What are they excited by and

motivated by and with this desire,

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this inner desire to fit in, I would

take those things on as my own.

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And this is really interesting because we

can take things on and convince ourselves.

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That it's what we want, like to our

core, we see something that someone

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else is doing, it seems successful,

or it paints a picture of what

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we think we want for ourselves.

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And before we know it, it's what we want.

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And I guess I'm saying to see this

really strong conversation of this

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notion of sleepwalking, right?

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Which was our very first

episode on this podcast.

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This sense of imitation is such a powerful

one for us to identify in our lives and

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give ourselves permission to break free

from because we don't need to imitate.

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In my work, I focus a lot on our

energy, our soul, coming back

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to the essence of who we are,

and it is absolutely impossible.

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For us to be the same as someone else.

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When our soul was getting ready to

incarnate at this time, it chose

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this particular beautiful, meaningful

body to go on this adventure on.

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And so it is not only physically,

DNA anatomically different from

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other people, even if you look

similar to a sibling the energy, the

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essence, the soul, the spirit, the

connection, the way that we see things.

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It's different yet we spend so much time

trying to imitate and fit in for this

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animalistic social acceptance type vibe.

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And this is something

humans have always done.

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It's always been safer in community.

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It's always been safer if we're accepted.

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But we've definitely taken it too far

in that out of fear and scarcity, we

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are willing to sacrifice so many parts

of ourselves for that acceptance based

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on what looks successful on the surface

or is successful for someone else.

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Because we are craving those feelings,

particularly if we, aren't in a

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space where we are absolutely full

with self-love and our own energy.

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If we've got energy leaks, if we are

looking outside ourselves for validation,

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these kind of empty out our life force

and our self-love just enough for us to

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feel like, oh, that thing that that person

over there has, that's what's missing.

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That's, that's the life force.

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That's the magic that I need.

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So how do I get there?

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And I say this with such love and

experience, such deep experience

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because Like I can reflect back now

and see, no matter what age I was,

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there was this element of needing, to

validate or needing to fill myself and

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my self worth with external factors.

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Looking around in the world and not

knowing what I really wanted, but

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seeing pieces reflected in others.

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But actually what I was

sensing was the energetic.

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The energetic self-love, the

energetic confidence, the energetic.

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Willingness to push edges and

and be authentic and be real.

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That's what I was sensing that I wanted

for myself, but I was translating

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it in terms of that's the physical

thing and the type of person and the

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look and the factor that I obviously

is missing for me to feel that way.

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And I was confusing the

energy with the physical.

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And what that does quite often is that

that's when we hit, uh, Google and be

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like, how do IX, Y, Z or best strategy

for, or, you know, we see the career

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that gives us the feeling, the energy.

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And then we think it's that tangible,

actual career itself and all of the

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wants and needs and haves associated

with that career or that lifestyle.

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And then we try and figure out what

is the 10 step plan to get there.

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It's such a human thing.

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'cause we all have these incredible,

powerful minds that can figure things

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out, that can learn, but we overuse

that power, that ability, thinking that

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it's the tangible and the physical.

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And so this is why I was talking about

this notion of pushing our edges.

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This is such a strong theme that's

coming through for me now, and is,

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is almost, hmm, what do I wanna say?

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The mantra.

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The mantra or the energy behind

this phase that I'm in at the

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moment is like, where are my edges

of what I feel is comfortable?

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Or where are my edges

of what I think I need?

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What's keeping me small?

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What's keeping me on a track that is

something that physically looks great,

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but is actually restricting me or keeping

me out of my body, out of my true essence

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and my energy, and where can I push that?

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Where am I not willing to break

rules based on fear of missing

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out or not becoming the thing

that I think I should have?

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This is the kind of dialogue that I am.

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Now becoming hyper aware of with,

with love, with this ability to

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soften, to ground, to expand.

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Because the more that we become aware of

these narratives, aware of these energies,

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and when we're attached to the physical

or the idea of something and then pushing

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our edges beyond that, this is where the

incredible growth and potential happens.

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And one of the subtleties of all of this

too, is that sometimes we don't know,

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we are afraid of those edges 'cause

we're not aware of where the edges are.

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We are so programmed, and again, just

speaking from having lived this, we are

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so programmed to just follow the plan

or follow the execution of something

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based on what we think we need.

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We get so caught up in that, that

it's actually really hard for us

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to see what's our edges and what is

a dream or desire of someone else.

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because so many times we end up

feeling well, I don't know what I want.

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Well, I feel like that could be

interesting, so I'm just gonna

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follow that because it's better than

feeling how I'm feeling right now.

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That space of I don't know who

I am, I don't know what I want.

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That is so depleting and it can

feel so terrifying because we

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want to be attached to something.

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We want to fit in.

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We want to feel that we're

whole and present and real.

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And so it's so easy that rather

than looking inside ourselves and

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finding those edges and being brave

enough to push them, we just go, Ugh.

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Overwhelm mind is running anxiety.

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And that's when we start to walk

down these pathways that aren't ours.

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And I've been thinking a lot lately about

where my edges are, based on external

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narratives that I've created, edges that

I've created on social acceptance or

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based on fear, based on past experience,

childhood experiences, all different

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types of experiences, even past life

experiences where I have set a boundary

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that's like, no, that's not for me.

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And this is the beautiful thing about

energy and really coming home to

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ourselves and being able to soften

and open and sense things because

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we can start to discern what is a

fear-based boundary or what is a

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fear-based decision based on X, Y, Z?

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Or even sometimes we don't

know what the X, Y, Z is.

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It's just, it's just a fear.

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It just is.

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'cause it's all we've ever known.

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And this is where coming back to the body

is so important and why spending time in

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places like nature walks like this can

be so valuable because all of a sudden.

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Just with the sound of the birds, with the

presence and the pace that you set when

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walking in nature, this is where you can

start to actually feel into some of those

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stories and some of those beliefs because

in especially when you're walking along.

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You can give yourself permission for your

mind to just stop, stop analyzing, stop

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running away with itself, to just breathe.

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And I like to often, 'cause I'm

a big believer in, in the mind

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actually not being the place

where we make the decisions from.

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It's actually the body, It's the sacral,

it's the heart, it's the soul plexus.

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It's these beautiful energy centers

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If you are into human design, you'll even

get even more specifics around where your

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decision making center is most powerful.

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And I can, I'll link a couple of

resources to some great human design

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places in the show notes if you're

interested and you haven't go into that.

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But the mind is not a

decision making center.

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Ooh, cockatoo agrees with us.

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I'm just gonna walk away

from this guy 'cause.

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He is pretty chatty.

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Hello friend.

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You know, we will have this debate and

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We'll ruminate on it over and over

and over again to try and make

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a decision from that place and.

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That's not what the mind is for.

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The mind is for processing,

for ideation, for ideas.

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It's not the master of what

we should do with our lives.

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It's just got real chatty this morning.

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It's not the decision maker of

what we wanna do in our lives.

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It's, that's not what it's built for.

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We need to get back into the body

to make those decisions to the body

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is the direct seat of the soul.

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It is the connection to our

higher self, to our soul, to

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our energy, to our life force.

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And when we leave that piece out

of the equation and makes it really

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difficult to make decisions in

alignment with our soul's essence.

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When we make decisions from our mind.

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We are making decisions based on

pieces of logic that we've picked

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up, and we all know that there are so

many things that we don't yet know.

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There's so many pieces of information,

of wisdom, of source that exists and

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is true, but our mind hasn't come in

contact with it yet, so it doesn't

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have it as learned knowledge, which

means there's a massive piece of the

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puzzle missing to then make a decision.

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Whereas when we connecting to the body

and we feel what those decisions are,

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It brings us to a much truer decision

and that's where coming back to the

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body, walking, being with yourself,

contemplating, I love contemplation.

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You'll hear me say that in

almost every podcast episode.

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It's like the thing I have

been contemplating this week

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or in this moment, or today.

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Allowing yourself to contemplate,

to use your mind to rumble through

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those known pieces of information

that we have, but coming back into

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the body in these moments in nature.

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Or if you create a beautiful sanctuary

at home that allows you to drop

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into your body, whatever that looks

like, and it will be different for

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everyone to just come in and feel.

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Through the path, feel,

through the decision.

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Feel through the edge of who you are and

what it is that you want to achieve, and

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then allowing the body to speak back to

you, allowing your intuition, your soul

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knowing to bring you a sign, a symbol,

a thought, a feeling that could be a

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physical feeling or an energetic feeling

to then build the picture for you.

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This is what.

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Makes us aware of some of those fears and

narratives that we've got playing based on

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things we've picked up on society or just

to fit in versus what's actually real.

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What is actually something that we

want to do or want to be, and where

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our limitations are around that.

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Because as soon as we have

this beautiful awareness of.

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Well, I've created an edge or a fear and

told myself that I don't do X, Y, and Z.

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We could feel into that and be like,

is that, is that just an edge based

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on a societal expectation that I can

hold the edge and step forward because

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I know I can feel it in my bone.

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That this is something

that I'm meant to be doing.

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Like I can feel it

physically and tangibly.

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This is something I have to do, but I

have this edge based on who I've told

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myself that I am or I'm not in the past,

or because I feel like it doesn't fit

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in or because I'm stuck in imitation.

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Or I've looked at what somebody else has

because it was too hard, too painful,

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too elusive for me to figure out myself.

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And so I'm on this imitation pathway,

and this edge is actually not mine.

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It's just a story that I've told myself.

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And here's the other thing that I wanna

say, which could be very polarizing,

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but I don't, necessarily agree or love.

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how we have become a

trauma story based society.

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And you'll hear this either in yourself

and if you're really honest with

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yourself, you'll see it within yourself.

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'cause I can see it when it pops up too.

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Or in others that you love

or in others around you.

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There will be something that

they're battling and all of a

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sudden you'll hear them say.

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Because of this childhood memory

or because of this childhood event

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or because of my parents' fear or

anger or exam, blah, blah, blah.

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I have X, Y, Z, done this behavior

and this is why I am this way.

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You'll hear the story

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and what happens.

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the intention behind stories can be

powerful because what they're trying

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to do is reparent ourselves, help us

reparent ourselves, or go back and

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love our inner child, or have awareness

around why a certain behavior exists.

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But a lot of people stop at the story.

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It's like, I have this story and this

is what it is, and I'm working on it.

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But the working on it doesn't

actually truly happen because

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they're too stuck in the story.

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One of the, I'm saying this with complete

love because this is where I used to live.

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This is how I used to be, especially

when I first came into personal

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development work and spirituality and

started to be able to go back into past

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life stuff or, you know, see visions

of past things for both myself and.

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The clients that I work with, and

it's so easy to build that narrative.

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'cause our brain, again, loves narrative.

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It loves story, it loves to be

able to go this equals this.

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We're so mathematical, even

when it comes to psychology And

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trying to figure things out.

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We love a good this plus this equals this.

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It's just how we wire it.

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And that can be so beautiful in

the healing process, but it's not

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beneficial if we get stuck in the

this plus this equals this, and we

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get stuck in a healing loop of, I'm

working on it, I'm working on it.

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I'm just, I'm going back

and reparenting her.

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but we don't ever move through that,

and we've created an edge around that.

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It's like this.

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Now that I know the story, it was

uncomfortable to discover the story and

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to do the healing work to find the story.

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But now I've created an edge that I

have the story that it's like safer

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and easier to justify than it is.

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To just decide not to have the story.

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There's a comfort that happens around

having the story, but I've worked

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with some beautiful, incredible

mentors now, and the model that I love

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that has evolved for me is see the

story, but choose differently anyway.

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Like see the story of I have this

tendency, or I have this belief.

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And I behave in this way

because of X, y, z story.

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But I choose now to let that go.

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Like I just choose a different story.

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I actually see the story evaporating.

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It actually doesn't become a narrative

anymore because it is an edge.

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It is a comfort edge that we create.

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In a classic example is, you know, I grew

up not on the poverty line, but just above

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it, and everything was always a struggle.

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Money was always a stretch.

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my parents had multiple small businesses.

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My dad was in Auto Lake and had

his auto lake business, and my

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mom had a crystal and jewelry

business and a massage business,

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and they also taught rock and roll.

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Like there was a lot of entrepreneurial

spirit, but out of a desperate need to

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keep the lights on with this toing and

froing between, I'm doing this because

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I'm entrepreneurial and I see the

opportunity here, but I also need to.

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Buy food to put on the table.

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And so this entrepreneurial

spirit was wrapped in this need of

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desperation, of scarcity, of fear.

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And so growing up I

lived in that paradigm.

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and then when I first started my business.

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Had a lot of scarcity around that.

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This mentality of you should

get a corporate job because

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it's safe, it's secure.

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You are less likely to fail

if you have a corporate job

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versus starting your own thing.

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'cause I saw my parents run multiple

businesses with this fear of always

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failing, always having to hustle.

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So there was this narrative and story.

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That became a money narrative.

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I have this money issue because of X,

Y, Z upbringing, and it becomes a story

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And instead of even just carrying the

story now I've chosen to work with the

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power of decision and I think this is

such a beautiful shift that can happen.

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it's like I just decide

that it's different.

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I decide that my financial reality is

different and it exists, and that's it.

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There's no story.

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And you might listen to this

and be like, well, that sounds

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easier said than done, but this

is what I'm talking about when it.

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When I talk about the connection

to our body and our decision

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making centers, because when,

because energy is malleable, right?

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Energy can move.

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We can move energy, we can set

energy based on our intention,

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especially when our intention is pure.

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So if we make the decision to claim and.

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Side connecting back to our body, and

that's what I'm saying, getting out

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of the mind and back into the body.

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For me, my most powerful decision

making center is my sacral sacral

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center, which is the second from the

body around the uterus or the womb.

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When I come back to that energy

center and just say, I am making

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this big claim and decision, and

there is no interference, there is

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no static, there is no mind chatter.

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The decision is made.

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That I am abundant.

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I'm abundant.

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And the more that we say it over

and over and over it becomes true.

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And when we make those decisions, this

is where we can get this interference.

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And we see very clearly

where our edges are.

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It's like, oh, but to be abundant,

I have to do an X, Y, Z, or to do

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this, I have to do X, Y, and Z.

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And that's not always helpful.

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Nor true,

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but what we can do is realize where

an edge exists, and then again, double

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down on that decision making and make

a powerful decision to do it anyway.

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Despite the fear, despite the story,

despite what the mind chatter is saying.

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Double down and take the action because

The more and more we do it over and

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over and over, it's going to shift.

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so my focus now is not on story.

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In fact I don't avoid story,

but I don't need story.

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And that is a massive difference.

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If there's a resistance or an edge or

a boundary, or even an expectation,

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I feel like I'm imitating of others.

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It's coming up.

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I won't even go into story anymore because

I know it can be a trap to get stuck in.

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I'll go into decision, intention, desire.

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I want this.

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Because I know that my soul is speaking to

me through my body, through my intuition,

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through my senses, sources, speaking to

me, that this is what I'm meant to do.

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So I make the powerful decision

that that is true, that that is

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so, and that that's what I'm gonna

do, and I'll move from that space.

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I'll also call in support,

love, opportunity.

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Helpful people.

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Make these, they're almost like commands

and people don't like this word command.

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Particularly there's an

energy in our society that.

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We shouldn't be commanding

particularly for women.

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But command.

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It is like you feel that word in

your gut when you allow it in.

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You feel that word in your gut.

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It's like,

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This is what I choose.

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My intention is hyperfocused

on this reality.

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And so that's the language

that I work with now.

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And it makes such an incredible

difference, particularly when you're

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:

facing a fear or you're facing an edge or

a boundary that we've created in the mind.

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It's like, sorry, mind, sorry, mind.

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This is an energy deal.

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Uh, this is being solved by energy

and intention, and you make it so.

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And this can be really hard to

get your mind around 'cause you're

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like, well, that just sounds easy.

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:

Like if that was that easy, then

I'm sure everyone would do it.

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:

Like, how do I switch my mind off?

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:

And there's a subtlety to it and it's

not perfect and my mind will still

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run away with me, But what I can tell

you is that the more that we decide

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to claim our power to claim who we are.

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To change our language and to

get into the energy of certainty.

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Even if we don't know what it feels like,

even if it's super foreign and we have no

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idea what we're doing, or it feels weird

or you don't believe it, coming back to

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:

this energy, whatever way we can grasp

it and stepping into this, the more we

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:

do it, the more it becomes real, the more

we're able to do it over and over and

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over, and it becomes the new baseline.

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:

It becomes the new learned pattern,

and that way we can start to step up

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:

to the threshold of the things that our

soul is calling for us to do and see

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:

the edge, see the fear, see the story.

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If we've got story that we've made around

it, and we can choose differently, but can

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:

be like, I'm gonna take this step anyway.

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I'm going to pursue this project,

I'm gonna run this test of something.

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:

You know, it is taking me ages to be

able to do these walking podcasts.

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:

'cause I was like, nobody's

gonna wanna listen to this.

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:

I need perfect audio in a studio.

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:

Like all this story and narrative and

expectation just based on past things.

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:

And I'm like, oh, just

get rid of all of that.

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:

Just go and do it.

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:

Run a test.

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:

So I've done a few tests

of this and I'm like.

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:

Yeah, I kind of like this.

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:

I like this both as someone

who's delivering it, but I

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:

also like to receive it too.

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:

When I listen back to them,

I'm like, this isn't nice.

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:

It feels real.

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It feels like we're walking side

by side, having a conversation.

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Because you can hear the realness of

it, you can hear the world around it.

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:

So run the test.

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:

See the edge.

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:

Allow yourself to come back to your body,

and whether that's go for a walk in nature

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:

and reconnect back to yourself or do a

grounding practice, whatever feels really

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:

good for you, come back to yourself,

see the edge and just walk past it.

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And by walking past the edges or walking

past the narratives or expectations

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:

that we think we have to do, that's

where we really start to discover the

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:

pieces of ourselves, the pieces of our

soul that have been calling to us for

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:

so long, they're just waiting for us to

listen because all of a sudden we are

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:

choosing and we're intentional around

dropping, needing to be like someone

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:

else, or looking out at the world and

being like, this is how I have to fit in.

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:

This is how I want to feel.

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:

Oh, they're doing it that

way to feel that way.

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:

So that's how I have to do it too.

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:

We start to drop that and

experiment for ourselves in what

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:

that looks like for ourselves.

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:

And make moves that only us could

make crazy combinations of things

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:

and ideas that just feel so

delicious and so blissful and we

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:

have no idea where we are going.

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:

'Cause that's the other big trap.

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Our mind wants to see the end

result before we take the move.

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:

But even if we can't see where we

are going, it just, you just know.

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:

You know in your bones, in your body

that there's something here for you,

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:

that there's some magic here for you.

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:

There's something you're meant to be

doing in this space and you just move.

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:

And it's amazing because as soon as

you make the move, The edge dissolves.

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:

'cause you're like, oh.

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:

Oh, that's what I was afraid of

and had created this big story

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:

about and had worried about.

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:

In my mind, my mind is such a

powerful processing tool, but it

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:

created so many different scenarios.

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:

It actually didn't exist.

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:

This is awesome, or this is not as

awesome as I thought, but it's okay

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:

because now I have a new piece of

the puzzle and I have the known.

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:

It's not an unknown anymore.

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:

I'm here and I'm like, Ooh, new

edge, or, Ooh, okay, cool Feedback.

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:

Amazing.

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:

I'm getting to learn and know myself.

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:

I'm getting to love myself more.

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:

I'm getting to see my bravery.

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:

I can see the pathway starting to open.

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:

'cause so many times we want

the pathway to be open and

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:

clear before we make a move.

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:

It's actually impossible for our brains.

467

:

To see the exact pathway of our

soul because it's not, it's not.

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:

What is there for the brain is

editors process information.

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:

It's not to see pathways,

it's not to see energy.

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:

The best healers, mediums, shamans,

psychics, I mean, we are all those things.

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:

Lemme just say that a strong belief that

we are all those things we just have

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:

chosen whether to open it or close it.

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:

But Those like myself, that

are fully open and trusting.

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:

We don't do it from our minds,

we do it from our energy senses,

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:

from our soul through our bodies.

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:

That's how we receive.

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:

And so the more that we can come back to

that, we start to open those channels,

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:

those abilities, we start to see and

dissolve edges even faster because all

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:

of a sudden we can see the ones that were

real and the ones that are manufactured,

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:

the ones that the mind created out of

fear are out of story, past experience.

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:

And then we can just keep moving one

step at a time, discover ourselves one

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:

step at a time And it's not even about

becoming something at the end of the day.

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:

It's just about coming home to self.

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:

And so if there's something

that you've been craving to do.

485

:

But you've got an edge.

486

:

You've got a block or you've

got a story or something that

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:

your mind is telling you.

488

:

This is your permission to break free

of that, to start playing with those

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:

edges, to come back to the body, to

come back to the seat of the soul.

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:

Maybe explore your human

design to see and connect.

491

:

'cause sometimes it can be helpful to

know that and be able to have a visual

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:

to really connect back into your body.

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:

And just take that next magical

step into deeper of who you are.

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I love you.

495

:

I hope you've enjoyed

this walking episode.

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:

Let me know.

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:

Send me a DM if you like it, any

feedback that you have, and I will

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:

see you in the very next episode.

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About the Podcast

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House of Andrea

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About your host

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Andrea Lee Matthies

Andrea Lee Matthies is an artist, photographer, and clairvoyant medium who creates portals for people to see and experience themselves more fully. Through her work, she blends creativity with clairvoyant insight, offering a unique perspective on what it means to thrive as a soul having a human experience.

As host of House of Andrea, Andrea brings together soulful conversations, channelling and subtle activations that invite listeners to awaken their intuition, dissolve self-imposed boundaries and step into the full spectrum of who they are.

Her approach is contemporary, vibrant, and deeply human - honouring both the beauty of the physical world and the unseen wisdom of spirit. Andrea’s mission is to help others feel seen, inspired and activated, so they can embody their own brilliance and frequency in everyday life.